ABOUT US

As a former foodservice manager and janitorial-company manager, and as a father of three special-needs children, I am in a position to help other dads. In addition to my experience, I have read and researched extensively (more than 100 books on parenting alone), and have learned volumes during my time as a parent. For nearly seven years now, I have been changing diapers, making dinner, and when I was home at night, getting up with them – 2 am, 3 am, 4 am…

For most of that time, I was also working outside of the home in areas that apply to stay-at-home dads, but I have always been very involved with their care. I have worked 3rd shift when I could, in order to be home when they were home. I was able to get them off to school and preschool in the mornings, and to take care of them in the afternoons and evenings. I am now at home with them full time.

The SAHD Survival Guides were written as a manual for dads, a course in all of the practical aspects. They were written out of frustration with the available tools. I already had some skills before I had children – I could cook and clean and play already – but I still needed to learn about other things. None of the books had everything I needed (and almost all of them were written for moms! I can’t tell you how many times authors assumed I was a woman, and I don’t need to tell you how insulting that is). Gender insults aside, I wanted more than just a book – I needed to learn how to survive in the kitchen with a family, plan menus, save money, juggle kids while I cooked, deal with special needs and special diets, and keep track of everything – appointments, groceries we needed, what clothing size the kids are in today (it will change tomorrow) – and do it all while keeping my head on straight.

So, my wife and I read every book we could get our hands on, and over the course of the last seven years, we’ve consumed hundreds upon hundreds of books. Now, I have all the skills I need, but you don’t want have to spend as much time as I did learning what you need to know. Don’t reinvent the wheel. Why spend every free minute for the next seven years or more reading, when you can take advantage of all the work I did?

I have taken the best information from thousands of sources (books, articles, interviews with experts, etc.) and from experience – both other fathers’ experience and my own – and have compiled it into information on this site, as well the Survival Guides, the Survival Guide Email Courses, and the Survival Guide Boiled-Down Books.

The skills I’ve developed over the years have been invaluable, because not only do I have three children to care for, they are all special needs children, and have been from birth.

Joel: When my wife was pregnant with our first child, he never seemed to stop moving round vigorously in the womb, and he bruised her ribs from the inside on several occasions (her OB asked her what happened – he suspected that I beat her!). Because of that, he told us that our baby was going to be a real challenge. The day after he was born, the hospital pediatrician “unofficially” told us that our baby was a genius, due to the fact that he could already do many things that babies much older than he was could not do. That was more indication that we had a real challenge on our hands. As a baby, he had colic and extreme reflux, never seemed to sleep more than a few minutes at a time, and had other sleep problems (talking, walking, night terrors and nightmares). He reached developmental milestones extremely early (first word at three weeks old, walking at eight months). The challenges never decreased. There were special diets for his IBS and for blood sugar problems. Last year, at the insistence of his kindergarten teacher, he was diagnosed with ADHD and medicated.

Rebecca: Our daughter was an easier baby, but she was a stereotypical “second-born.” She also talked at three weeks, but didn’t do anything else early, or even “on time.” She didn’t walk until she was 17 months old – she was content to sit, watch and listen to everyone and everything around her. She had serious GI problems from the time she started on formula (at 9 months). When she was two years old, she faced having abdominal surgery. Without going into any details, I’ll say that we had one day left (to get the problem solved) before the doctor was going to operate, and it was frightening for all of us. In her, it took over 100 times the amount of medication it normally takes for adults, and she lost nearly half her body weight by the time it was over. When she turned three, she changed in many ways. She talked constantly, even in her sleep. She was diagnosed with ADHD at the same time as our son.

Alexander: Our second son has been the easiest baby imaginable. He plays with toys (something the others never did), sleeps, and coos. He also said his first word early, but that appears to be the only similarity so far. The only challenge with him: he started breaking out in a rash and crying, especially after dinner each night. Working with the pediatrician, we determined that he was allergic to wheat and milk. That meant no more mixed baby foods, breastmilk or regular formula for him!

Member of:

CHADD (Children and Adults with ADD)

CHADD Provides information and support for families coping with ADD/ADHD and publishes Attention Magazine.

ACFC

(American Coalition for Fathers and Children)

ACFC Promotes

co-parenting and advocates for the rights of fathers.